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A Parent’s Ultimate Sacrifice

February 12th, 2018|

As the mother of two young boys, I can say without hesitation that I’d give my life to save theirs.
I can’t claim bragging rights for this pledge, though it is clearly brave and selfless. Parents, whether human or in the animal kingdom, are wired to protect their young. Across cultures and creeds, races and generations, our youth, their innocence and untapped potential, has more value than our own. The love, hope, and sense of duty parents feel for their children is why we have life and why the cycle continues.
We see our children suffer and want to kiss away their tears. We long to right them and pray, If only I could take their pain. Conscious thought is not required, our instinct for survival dissolves. Suddenly, the greatest sacrifice becomes the easiest decision.
Do you know of a parent who has given her life for one of her children? Sarah Chebet of Lenana Girls’ High School in Kitale, Kenya has a new heart to sustain her and a story to tell.
“I was given the heart of my father and he died. Nobody believed that he would do such a thing for one child when [my parents] already had four. But he chose to save my life…out of love.”
Here is her full essay, which earned Second Place in Lenana’s Fifth Annual Writing Competition hosted by Lift the Lid:
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And So It Goes . . . Love Never Ending

February 1st, 2018|

Deborah writes about love with a child’s unfiltered honesty. “Love is like the sunshine. It shines for a while and then it’s gone … It is like the birth of a child. It hurts for a while, then is soon forgotten, leaving you with only the memories of a wonderful and loving life.” Deborah is only in grade school, but she knows that with love there is also heartache and loss. How early do we learn that love is both perfect and flawed?
When I founded Lift the Lid eight years ago, my first fundraising strategy for our schools was to ask my family to make donations in lieu of my birthday and Christmas gifts. At first, they were uncomfortable without a gift in hand, but they have since come to understand the gift the students are to me. I love each one wanting nothing in return.
The students experience my love through our writing projects, through the basic needs Lift the Lid covers, and through their education, which we strive to improve every day. Their actions and writings pass that love on to their parents, teachers and friends, and so it goes, love never ending.
We are channels of love and connected by it, a force strong enough to unite the world, if allowed to grow.
Thank you, Mom and Tim, for your love and for this year’s Christmas gift, your donation to Namelok Junior Academy in Kisamis, Kenya, where Deborah attends the third grade. Our current priorities at Namelok are to buy text books and to pay the teachers’ salaries.
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The Price for New Slippers

January 24th, 2018|

Begging can’t be easy. It takes will-power and a resilience no rejection can break. Patience. A certain amount of acting. And in Cubao, the Philippines, the physical strength to jump on and off jeepneys (open buses), to push through crowds, to run from trouble. The rewards are high: money and survival, so you can see why children, especially, might feel proud to beg.
Lift the Lid received an anonymous donation to The School in a Cart in Cubao, the Philippines, and as always we show our appreciation with a student’s letter, personal essay or poem. Today we have a personal essay from Alexis, or as her friends call her, Kaykay. She describes how she spent Christmas, giving gifts, eating a special meal, and begging. Kaykay does not complain or talk about her shame, rather we see how begging has become a past-time, a means to an income for herself and her family, and perhaps even something she can feel proud of.
Our partners at The School in a Cart, the teachers and caregivers, discourage begging. They reward the children who resist the practice for going to school and doing their homework by taking them on field trips or out for special dinners. They warn of the dangers interacting with strangers, jumping the jeepneys, and traveling out of their neighborhood. But, still, it’s clear that Kaykay does not feel remorse for her actions. It’s an understandable, yet sad, truth.
We will continue to discourage begging, to encourage school, books, play time, music and prayer. We will continue to love and protect these beautiful children, who have an abundance of will-power, resilience, patience, and hope for life.
Kaykay is ten years old and in the 3rd grade. She is the 5th of seven siblings. Here is a translation of her essay from Tagalog, as well as her original work: “Thank you very much Ate (big sister) Sara for everything you have given to us! This is what we did this Christmas. We went to the Riverbank to eat. I also bought a pair of slippers from what I got from begging. Also at Christmas, we were at the sidewalk waiting for gifts from people. There were a few who gave us food and toys. I also gave part of what I got from begging to my mother and she bought me a few pieces of clothing. I Love you Ate Sara. Please do not get tired of helping me. I will study harder.”
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Kenyan Girls Show Us Good Writing

January 12th, 2018|

Lift the Lid sponsored its Fifth Annual Writing Competition at Lenana Girls’ High School in Kitale, Kenya and we are so excited to share the results. Every year we receive more submissions, and though the quality of writing varies depending on the age and experience of the students, we have set a tone within the competition whereby they aspire to honest and brave writing.

The young women at Lenana are finding the courage and determination within themselves to write from their hearts. We can teach them to edit and rewrite their words for clarity and accuracy, but finding that music within themselves takes letting go of everything else . . . and is at the core of good writing.

Congratulations to Abigael Nyongesa for placing First! Her essay about her father’s love and trying to go on after his sudden death speaks humbly and honestly to anyone who has experienced grief.

As part of the annual competition, Lift the Lid offers the students writing tips and encouragement. We also highlight what we feel is each student’s strongest sentence. Here are the chosen sentences of our 2017 Finalists. One sentence can hold the impact of an entire essay. One sentence can show a writer her worth.

First Place winner Abigael Nyongesa writes, “There are infinite number of ways that this world can hurt us and no two heartaches are exactly alike and no one can articulate the heartache of someone else, but sometimes the best way to heal is to share pain with others–others who care about us and love us.” Her full essay is below!
  • “Go beyond the rim of time or space, the same inflection of their voice will sing their way into the deepest of my mind still.”
  • “Their love has encouraged me to work hard in my studies and not to drop out of school.”
  • “Parents’ love can make one go far. People say that a journey always starts with a step.”
  • “I can confidently say that the lady changed my life.”
  • “All treasure and respect land to my beloved mother who has no boundaries when it comes to love.”
  • “She encourages me not to give up in life for God has a good plan for us.”
  • “I thank God for giving me parents, and I pray to God for blessing them abundantly and giving them a long life in this world.”
  • “Sometimes I fail to understand how much [my parents] feel about doing all these things for me, but it is only love.”
  • “My mother’s love changed me to be a person with a dream and a better future.”
  • “I had always no hope in my life because of the poverty that had been experienced by our family, but because God is love, I saw true love in my teacher.”
  • “This love felt like clutching to a very beautiful but fragile treasure that you want to handle with much care.”
  • “I vividly remember one day I met a beggar. She told me ‘special day,’ but I did not answer her.”
  • “I appreciate and am proud of [my parents], and I pray to God to give them more years so that they will live long until I achieve my dreams.”
  • “This love is fraternal, meaning the tender devotion my brother has towards me. At first I did not recognize it, but as time went by, it came out itself.”
  • “Although when everybody thought I was cursed or even bad blood, as they called me, I still pushed forward with the help of my mother.”
  • “I am so proud of him. He did what most fathers would not have done. Others would have had another wife to raise their kid, but he did not do it.”
  • “The following day my father went and talked with the doctor who was going to do the operation, and he said that he had decided to give me his heart.”
  • “I had no name but now I have a name. I am no longer a ‘black sheep’ but a ‘white sheep.’ Sometimes you may feel like the whole world hates you, but as long as you were chosen by God, He will show you love through his people.”
 Here is Abigael’s winnng essay:
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Why Do We Write to the Dead?

October 13th, 2017|

Sunshine, photographed below, and many of the children at The School in a Cart in Cubao, the Philippines, have written letters to their friend Dave, who was murdered in his sleep on the city streets this past May. Their letters express their sorrow, their confusion and disbelief, their anger and guilt, and their faith that Dave lives on in spirit and can read their letters or at least know what is written on their hearts. So, why do we write to the dead? Saying good-bye is ingrained in our daily human existence, across all cultures, whether to the dead or to family members when we step out to do some shopping. We feel incomplete, shaken, panicked even, if we leave someone we love for an extended period of time without saying good-bye, without an embrace or a kiss. We need that closure and the comfort that comes from a sense of connection despite distance. Yes, even if that person has died. But is a letter to the dead purely for ourselves as we work through our grief and long for closure? Maybe not. Most letters to the dead are written as if in conversation, as if the diseased were right there, reading them over our shoulders. Our words come from our hearts, and whether we believe in the after-life or not, our hearts tell us that love transcends time, matter, and is ever-lasting.   See Sunshine's letter to Dave below in Tagalog, followed by the English translation: So sudden was the stabbing and Balong (Dave) was gone. We were sad for what happened to my cousin (Sunshine considered Dave a cousin.) He was our cousin and we loved him even if he was naughty and hard-headed. Why did this happen? He did not do what they thought he had done. He did not break the car window. I could not accept that this had to happen. I hope the one who did this will be caught soon. May his conscience bother him! There were many kids around but why was it that it was you the culprit saw. I wished you went home with Kuya (big brother Jordan.) I wished you did not feel sleepy and did not leave your house. Don’t give up. I will get even for you. You were not only a cousin, you were a good friend. I know you and Kuya were always together. I hope you are happy in heaven. Don’t be said because we will get the one who killed you so that you will then be happy. We love you very much, cousin and best friend.
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Does Love Grow Old??

July 1st, 2017|

Does love grow old? When Abigael Mantaine sat down to think about love for Namelok’s Fourth Annual Poetry Competition, she thought of her mother. She thought of moments she felt completely comforted and at peace, of her mother’s gentleness and protection, her advice and acceptance. The love she remembers doesn’t end with her youth. Her mother ages, becomes frail; time wears away, but her love is unchanging. Abigail fears the day she’ll lose her mother, but never has to fear losing her love.

My nonprofit Lift the Lid, which supports underfunded schools and encourages the students to write, hosts annual writing and poetry competitions at each of the three schools we work with in Kenya, and at the Happy Family Children’s Village in Tanzania, the latest addition to our outreach! First place winners receive $100, $50 of which to use for their own needs and $50 to buy something needed or just plain fun for their class. We also choose a second place winner ($25) and honorable mentions.

Congratulations, Abigail, on placing First!!

Here is her winning poem, typed for ease of reading and her original work below:

My Mother

“Love is a strong feeling that you have when you [feel] a mother’s love for her children.

When I was a child, [my mother] would comfort me. She wiped my tears, so tenderly.

As I laid my head upon her chest, this was my most peaceful rest.

She sang to me so I would sleep. These precious moments are mine to keep.

Her gentle touch, her caring face, there could be no other to take her place.

She tried to teach me right from wrong. She always gives and never takes. Never does she criticize my mistakes.

The years have quickly passed by, in her eyes the aging lies.

Her skin has wrinkled, her hair turned grey. How I yearn for yesterday.

She is tired, her health is poor. She sits waiting for me to walk through the door.

When she is gone, my heart will die, and I will count the days till I see her again.

This person I speak of could be no other. She is, of course, my loving mother.”

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How We Help Each Other to Carry On After a Tragedy

June 7th, 2017|

London was home to me and my family for five years. The recent attacks feel personal, and it hurts to see the City and our friends living there terrorized. Violence in another form, though much the same, has taken the life of our student, Dave, who was murdered in his sleep on May 15th at the age of 13, soon to be 14. We can grieve. We can remember. We can embrace an ethos of determined strength and vigilant caution. And we can reach out to those who are suffering.

Thank you, Pastors Torquil Allen and Richard Bowman of Frampton Park Baptist Church in London, England. I hope it is a consolation that your donation means a great deal to the grieving students at The School in a Cart in Cubao, the Philippines. Principal Alfredo Olavidez took them shopping for school supplies, backpacks, new uniforms and shoes. The outing to the discount market reminded everyone that life will continue with happiness and hope.

School in a Cart students school shopping

Writing is a solace for grief. Below is Dave's cousin Richard Jay's essay, written a few days after hearing of Dave's tragic death. Following the English translation is his original essay in Tagalog:

Richard Jay writes:

I was sad and angry when I learned that Balong (Dave’s term of endearment), my cousin and best friend, was gone. He did not do any harm to be stabbed helplessly. He was so young to deserve this thrill killing.

There were times we cousins quarreled but misunderstandings were settled immediately after I approached him to patch up. If I did not have enough money to rent a computer to play, he would make up for the difference. Every time we ate together he saw to it that I ate first. My cousin was loving even if sometime he was hardheaded. When he served me food at his house, he did not allow me to get out until I finished my share. He forced things out and would not stop until he got what he wanted.

Balong respected my parents. He helped us when there were things to move around the house. He helped babysit “Pogi” (RJ’s 1 year old brother whose pet name means handsome.) He made us cousins happy especially at times when we slept at a rooftop. He was a joker when we were lonely. However, he was serious when it come to playing a computer game or basketball.

Balong was a jolly fellow. He could smile and laugh even if he had problems. If he got in trouble with somebody we, his cousins, came to his rescue. But he did not want us to get involved in any fight he got into. But if we were in trouble, he helped us even if he got beaten up.

 

Richard Jay playing his guitar in The School in a Cart Band

Click to enlarge RJ's essay in Tagalog

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How Do You Measure Friendship?

May 13th, 2017|

How do you measure friendship? Without sounding selfish and contrived, I think we largely value our friendships by what we get out of them. Emotional support. Mental and cultural stimulation. Work and social connections. Companionship. Laughs . . .

But here’s another way of measuring friendship: by what we give. And this just might be our spiritual gain. Giving to others boosts confidence and instills a sense of purpose. So, in essence, even when we give, we get.

Roseline from Mogonjet Secondary School in Kericho, Kenya comes from a family of 15 children, and even though she scored high on the National Primary Exam for entrance into high school, her parents could not afford the fees. She stayed home, not giving up hope that one day she’d continue her education.

Not long after the start of school, a friend’s parents offered to cover her school fees, as well as for her younger siblings. Their show of commitment to the community and love to Roseline and her family is a perfect way to measure friendship, and I’m confident their lives will be blessed for it.

Here is Roseline’s essay, which was shared with a donor who contributed to Lift the Lid's Library Fund at Mogonjet Secondary School. Click below to enlarge the image.

 
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Where Does Our Happiness Come From?

May 2nd, 2017|

We have been working with The School in a Cart in Cubao, the Philippines since 2011, raising money for and partnering with the students to give them a healthy life, a good education, spiritual awareness, and happiness. On Happiness, the children have enjoyed many holiday and school graduation parties, but when they write about their best days, they describe the hard work they’ve put into the band we formed in 2014, The Push Cart Children’s Band. They’ve written about their fear of learning new instruments, about the times they had failed to get the notes right, the countless hours they’ve spent practicing, and their insecurities performing in front of crowds.

Then they write about the applause and seeing family members watching and smiling from the audience. They write about feeling more proud than they ever thought possible. You can feel the emotion in Steven’s essay (below), as he describes in detail the first time they played at a popular shopping mall.

Steven on vocals between Daniella and Carla.

Recently, The Band played for a local church retreat. The children were invited to spend the night and partake in the fun, swimming in the hotel pool and sleeping in a proper bed! Many of them live with their families on the streets. These luxuries are a big deal and will hopefully inspire them to stay on track with their education.

Retreat-MacMac essay-pool-CM-SIAC-Apr2017 Retreat-MacMac essay-beds-CM-SIAC-Apr2017 Retreat-dinner served-CM-SIAC-Apr2017

We can provide and encourage and reward the children of The School in a Cart with happy days, but it is up to them to do the hard work, to overcome their fears and insecurities, and to step out on stage or show up for the exam when it really counts.

Speaking for Lift the Lid and the many donors who drive us forward, our happiness comes from each and every one of our students, from every small step of achievement they take and all the words they proudly brave writing for us. It’s amazing how much they are capable of giving!

Here is Steven’s essay translated from Tagalog. His original writing follows the translation.

Hi, I am Steven Mark (Macmac),

When I joined the band, I did not how to play the guitar or the drums but when Sir (Nonie) heard my voice, I finally was in. I was happy practicing singing. Our practice became frequent. We sung at Churches, at The Lord’s Church.

When Sir Iddo told us that we would play at Ali Mall, we had to practice ridgidly. On Sept 22, came the event we have been waiting for. Before we went to Ali Mall, we had another round of practice. Exactly at 5 PM we started playing. I was shy at first but when I saw my parents and brother in the audience my being shy went away.

My voice was already hoarse when we sung the last song. After the performance we ate while our parents went home. That was one of the happiest days.

Steven MacMac Abalayan-essay Family Support-CM-SIAC-Apr2017
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How Will I Know When It’s Love?

April 7th, 2017|

Ask Now: When you want to get married, how does it feel? Fourteen-year-old Nzula Kivuva from Lenana Girls High School in Kitale, Kenya has many questions about life, as you can see in her letter below. For this post, I’ve highlighted Love.

Perhaps you know how your body works, about monthly periods and the pros and cons of hormones. Your parents or teachers might have been frank about sex: the risks, the responsibility of parenthood, and why waiting for marriage could help you to have clarity and avoid the wrong relationship. But do you know what it feels like to be in love?

I was thirty when I met and married my husband, Jonas, and then we waited until we were thirty-five before having our first son. We made the decision together, and at that point the idea of having a baby and becoming parents was very exciting. But before we got to that point, we learned to trust each other. We learned to appreciate each other's vulnerable spots, our hopes in life, and the fears that try to hold us back. We learned acceptance, and it came as a relief. We felt comfortable enough, confident enough to be ourselves, individuals in a close relationship. Unbounded and held tight. Free and devoted to each other.

Life is hard, but love comes easy when you're with the right partner. Mistakes are unavoidable, but forgiveness prevails. He walks into a room, and my heart jumps, as if I'm just seeing him and it's all new and exciting. For no apparent reason, I smile uncontrollably.

I wasn't a virgin when I met Jonas, and I had regrets, but I gave myself the time and space to let go of the negative thoughts, to find peace and self-respect, to feel strong, on my own.

If you’re feeling disappointed for becoming sexually active too soon, if your boyfriend or girlfriend and everyone else in your life has let you down, remember God’s unwavering love for you. Allow that Perfect Love to rebuild your self-esteem, and then Love Yourself back to a place where you can begin again.

   
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